Couple Faces Alzheimers With Family Plan, Plenty of Love

After five decades of marriage, Robert and Edna Nicholson are preparing for one of the hardest seasons of their lives by doing what they have always done: facing it together.

Robert is living with Alzheimer’s disease, and as his memory changes, the Richmond Heights couple is working to make sure his voice remains part of every important decision.

They found help through SHARE, a program offered by the Benjamin Rose Institute on Aging. The program works with people experiencing early memory loss and the relatives or friends who support them.

Rather than waiting for a crisis, SHARE encourages families to talk early about care, daily routines, safety, responsibilities and the wishes of the person with memory loss.

For Robert and Edna, those conversations led to a larger family meeting. Relatives agreed to take on specific roles, including transportation, laundry, prescriptions, errands, companionship and physical assistance if Robert’s needs increase.

The planning also gives Edna more support and helps ensure she is not left to manage every part of Robert’s care on her own.

The program is now being studied as a way to better reach African-American families. Researchers say Black adults are disproportionately affected by Alzheimer’s disease, but many families remain hesitant to participate in dementia research or discuss memory loss openly.

Benjamin Rose has adjusted the program to make it more welcoming and accessible. Organizers are using less stigmatizing language, allowing participation before a formal diagnosis and inviting more family members into the planning process.

Researchers are still looking for about 70 additional couples to join the study.

For the Nicholsons, the program has offered something especially valuable: a chance to prepare without taking away Robert’s independence or personality.

His family says one of his biggest goals is to keep making people laugh, whether he is chatting with neighbors, meeting someone at the grocery store or telling a favorite joke at a restaurant.

Even as Alzheimer’s changes parts of their lives, Robert and Edna are holding on to what has carried them for 50 years: commitment, humor and a willingness to care for one another.